'Twas Dawn Upon the Elken Plain
When ancient elder said to me
Go not ye east, for only pain
And death are there for thee.
Beware the Kittyhawk, he swore
The jaws that bite, the claws that rend
Beware the airborne hairball, for
It signifies your end.
'Twas Midday on the Elken field
When I was told by ancient sire
Go not ye west, for naught can shield
Your body from the fire
Beware the phoenix flame, my son
The heat that burns, the claws that snare
Beware the Barbecue and shun
The ashes in your hair.
'Twas twilight on the Elken fyrd
When from the east came padded feet
And from the west came flaming bird
Both were mad; both in heat
Beware when mythic beasts seduce
The flailing tails; the pumping legs
Beware of what can be produced;
Fuzzy fire-colored eggs
'Twas midnight on the Elken heath
When egg did crack and beast drew breath
With nasty, mean, sharp pointy teeth
And flaming claws of death
Beware the flamenpuss and hide
When see ye flame or hear ye squawks
Beware that you don’t end inside
A flamin’ litter box.
-Jonas Doeus, Scribe.